Work and parenting......
Not blogged in ages – I’d like to say there was too much going on, but truth is, it’s really down to a lack of motivation. Did I really want to share with anyone else some of the low times?
Truthfully, not really. But I guess if I only managed to put good stuff down in writing, it wouldn’t be a terribly realistic or authentic life.
Work has not been easy. Following a number of difficult meetings with my Line Manager, I have had to agree to a reduction in my working hours (and salary), and although there seemed to be a plus to this ( I get a night off from counselling), in practise, it’s been a difficult and politically sensitive decision, so is on a trial basis only. The whole process has left me feeling pretty yuk about me, my job, and my colleagues.
However, I did feel that an important change in me was an ability to be “honourably assertive”. I did not shout at any of these meetings, but neither did I lie down and let people walk all over me. I realised that I have been quite compliant for most of my life, and so this was quite a change for me. I think the changes have worked out thus far as well as it could have done, but it will take time to implement, as I can’t just say to clients “sorry, I have to stop seeing you as of right now!”
Also would value your prayers about my youngest son, Andy. Had a very interesting chat with him today, which, although it has helped me to understand one very significant part of how he thinks and feels, is going to be tricky to help him with. I know that all parents have times when they doubt how well they’ve raised their children, and how ready they might be for a huge, imposing world, which seems frightening to us as adults, let alone them. In my lifelong determination to demonstrate that I desire to treat them as normally as I can, there are still times when the reality of them having Asperger’s Syndrome rears it’s ugly head again, and takes me by surprise. I won’t go into any more details here, as that would be unfair to him, but prayers would be appreciated.
Thanks for all the birthday wishes – I’ll write a little bit more another time about my birthday weekend.
Truthfully, not really. But I guess if I only managed to put good stuff down in writing, it wouldn’t be a terribly realistic or authentic life.
Work has not been easy. Following a number of difficult meetings with my Line Manager, I have had to agree to a reduction in my working hours (and salary), and although there seemed to be a plus to this ( I get a night off from counselling), in practise, it’s been a difficult and politically sensitive decision, so is on a trial basis only. The whole process has left me feeling pretty yuk about me, my job, and my colleagues.
However, I did feel that an important change in me was an ability to be “honourably assertive”. I did not shout at any of these meetings, but neither did I lie down and let people walk all over me. I realised that I have been quite compliant for most of my life, and so this was quite a change for me. I think the changes have worked out thus far as well as it could have done, but it will take time to implement, as I can’t just say to clients “sorry, I have to stop seeing you as of right now!”
Also would value your prayers about my youngest son, Andy. Had a very interesting chat with him today, which, although it has helped me to understand one very significant part of how he thinks and feels, is going to be tricky to help him with. I know that all parents have times when they doubt how well they’ve raised their children, and how ready they might be for a huge, imposing world, which seems frightening to us as adults, let alone them. In my lifelong determination to demonstrate that I desire to treat them as normally as I can, there are still times when the reality of them having Asperger’s Syndrome rears it’s ugly head again, and takes me by surprise. I won’t go into any more details here, as that would be unfair to him, but prayers would be appreciated.
Thanks for all the birthday wishes – I’ll write a little bit more another time about my birthday weekend.
3 Comments:
Obviously a difficult time for you, it sounds like you handled the work thing well, As for your boys, it is because of your parenting and bravery that has given them many opportunities, when it would have been easier for you to 'wrap them up in cotton wool', they will thank you for that in the future,
I hope and pray this is is a good week for you all, come on everyone, let's get praying!!
By Helen, at 7:49 am
Pat,
Really sorry that I didn't pick this up earlier. Sorry too, that I seem to have missed your birthday.
Will pray into the complexities of life that you are facing. No matter what you may feel, you are a shining Christian witness. How many people at work who have to go through negative change deal with it so professionally and reasonably. I can definitely say that in my new role...
You give so much to so many please don't underestimate that.
Hugs and prayers
Sarah :-)xx
By SarahB, at 12:52 pm
Hi Pat,
I... found your site off of Helen's. I've gotta tell ya, I'm horrible at the parenting thing (maybe because I'm not one?!) I've learned that its just insulting and stupid to give advice when you have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. Even though I have nothing to say on that front, I'll be praying. For you and for Andy.
By Cass, at 4:15 am
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